On 2/1/02 – 2/3/02 Jimmy and Jim Bob Cohenour and Eddie Lee Toohey joined us for our FCS Hog Hunt with Texas Wild near Charlotte. Eddie Lee and Jim Bob missed a sow on Friday evening but Eddie Lee shot a Javelina on Sunday morning.
After hunting two other ranches with similar fair to poor results, the Cohenour’s decided to develop their own hog ranch south of El Campo, near Blessing. They bought 100 acres bordering the Colorado River.
Their ranch is divided into two sections. They have an electric fence for the front half of the property to keep the hogs in. They maintain around 60 hogs on this half of the property. The rear half of the property borders the river, where hogs are free to come and go. Although most hunting is done by stalking they have several blinds and feeders. One stand is 52 feet tall (not a typo).
On 12/29/02, Kelvin Cheung, my son, Ryan, and I arrived at the ranch at about 6:00 PM. Jim Bob, who basically runs the ranch, recommended stalk hunting but, as it would soon be dark, we asked to hunt from stands. I hunted by myself. Kelvin, who was an observer and not a hunter this trip, hunted with Ryan. Shortly after getting into their stand Ryan and Kelvin had a head of hogs come in to their corn. A mid-sized boar fed on some hog slop just 10 yards away from their stand. Ryan shot it in the head with his .270. It weighed 152 pounds.
Ryan was very excited as this was the first big game animal that he harvested and it was also his 18th birthday. We skinned, dressed, and quartered the hog and then went to bed.
The next morning we decided to conduct a drive. Jim Bob put me at a large tree that had fallen over (to use as a rest). He informed me that most shots there were at running animals. I leaned my .25-06 on the tree and waited while Jim Bob went to a swampy area to hopefully drive some pigs towards me.
In a few minutes I heard the unmistakable sound of several animals running through the woods. A herd of about 50 pigs ran broadside about 40 yards in front of me. Thinking that I would not get a better opportunity I took a shot and hit a medium sized hog. Ryan and Kelvin (who were observing from the tall blind) saw the hog lie down and reported that fact to me via our two way radios. Thinking that the hog had expired, Jim Bob and I went to retrieve it. This proved to be a big mistake. The hog heard us coming and got up and ran off into thick woods.
Those who know me know that I absolutely despise wounding birds and animals. I’ve been known to look for a wounded dove for half an hour – while ignoring dozens more that are flying over my head. I believe that I have a responsibility to the wounded creature to retrieve it and if it is not dead to dispatch it quickly and humanely.
God made it clear to Adam in Genesis 1:28 (NLT) that he had dominion or was to rule over the rest of His creation. “God blessed them and told them, "Multiply and fill the earth and subdue it. Be masters over the fish and birds and all the animals." Part of the responsibility of being a master or ruler is to treat your subjects fairly.
I was sick about wounding the hog. I was also mad at myself for deciding to take the shot in the first place and for impatiently pushing the hog and not giving it at least half an hour to expire. I had never trained to shoot at moving targets on the ground with a scoped rifle. I've shot plenty of rabbit targets on sporting clays courses but shooting a scoped rifle at a running animal is vastly different than shooting a shotgun at a clay target.
I was also kicking myself for choosing to shoot with my rifle, when I had my 12 gauge 3” magnum semi-automatic shotgun leaning right beside me. The fifteen 00 buck pellets that each shell contained would have been a much better choice for shooting at running game at that range.
It also turned out that Jim Bob’s prediction that most of our shots would be at running hogs did not come to past– at least for our hunt. If I had waited I would have had several opportunities to shoot hogs that were standing still.
We looked for the hog for several hours to no avail. During our search we chased the big herd several times back and forth across the property. Twice I had the herd running broadside 10 yards from me but I didn't take a shot because I didn’t see the one that I had wounded. Shooting another hog was out of the question at that point. It would have delayed my responsibility to find the hog that I had wounded and dispatch it if it was not dead. I just couldn’t bear the thought of knowing that the wounded hog might still be suffering while I selfishly took another.
At one point the boys drove the herd straight for me. The hogs saw me and moved off to my left. I ran down a trail (hidden behind thick trees) and positioned myself behind a four foot tall bush where I thought they would appear. My shotgun was at the ready. In less than a minute they appeared exactly where I anticipated. The lead pigs skidded to a stop just five yards from me! The rest of the herd bunched up behind them. It was one huge mass of pigs! I couldn't have missed even with my eyes closed! But not seeing my wounded hog I again did not take a shot and watched them run back to the swampy area.
But there comes a time when one must admit defeat. We searched for another two hours. Discouraged, I came to the conclusion that we were not going to find the wounded hog. Not wanting to go home empty handed, I reluctantly decided to hunt for another hog.
Jim Bob and Kelvin did another drive towards Ryan and I, who were hidden behind some big trees. The herd ran towards us but diverted up a hill. I ran up the hill angling towards them. When I got to the top they again ran across my bow about 20 yards from me. I picked out a decent sized hog and nailed him with my shotgun. He ran about 50 yards and collapsed.
We pulled eight of the 15 pellets out of his hide. They went though him and stuck on the other side. The other seven pellets either went completely through or missed him. He weighed 135 pounds.
Seven days later Jimmy informed me that they found the hog that I wounded and finished him off. I was greatly relieved.
You and I have a commonality with that wounded hog. We’ve all been wounded as well. Probably most of us suffered wounds during childhood. Even children raised in the best homes and who attended the best schools still suffered wounds because they interacted with flawed, sinful people.
John Eldredge in his modern classic Wild at Heart devotes several chapters to the wounds that we receive and how to receive healing. He espouses that although some wounds are inflicted by friends and relatives most of the wounds that boys will receive will be inflicted on them by their fathers.
In Wild at Heart Eldredge chose to target men, so he doesn’t explore the wounds that girls receive. Certainly fathers inflict their fair share of wounds on their daughters but studies show that the wounds that girls receive are often exacted by their mothers.
Some wounds are unintentional. Often they are the result of a father working mega hours to support his family. He leaves for work before his children rise and when he finally drags himself home he’s too tired to spend any time with them. He does not want to hurt his children but being an absent father wounds them none-the-less.
These are wounds of neglect. Children in such homes often believe that if they were smarter, more athletic, better people, or more loveable that their father would want to spend more time with them. They believe that they are the reason for their fathers’ absence – that there is something wrong with them.
Women tend to be less driven at work and more interested in child rearing, but over the last couple decades or so we have heard of more and more cases of mothers who neglected their children.
Some wounds are very intentional. Often these wounds are inflicted by parents who are trying to re-live their lives through their children – to make up for things that they failed at as children. For example a father who wasn’t a star athlete tries to make his son into one. And heaven help that boy if he wants to play in the marching band instead of play football.
Or a mother who wasn’t very attractive as a child tries to make her daughter into a beauty queen. If her daughter can’t take the pressure she finds herself alone and rejected.
Parents who have this mindset try to pressure their child into getting with the program. If the child still refuses to get on board some will result to threats, actual punishment, and even verbal and psychological abuse.
A boy who wants to play the tuba instead of baseball may be called a wimp by his dad. A girl who wants to play soccer instead of competing in pageants may be called a dike by her mom. Before long the child starts to believe that the labels are true and act accordingly.
Sometimes children in such situations have extreme reactions. A mother abandons her family for another man and her neglected daughter vows that she’ll never let anyone get close to her again. A boy called a wimp by his dad over compensates and becomes the school yard bully.
Many of our wounds are self-inflicted. A girl who starts to drink as a teenager struggles with alcoholism for the rest of her life. A boy who spends money as soon as he gets it finds later in life that he always runs out of money before he runs out of month. Trends become routines. Routines become habits. Habits become a way of life.
Most of King David’s wounds were self-inflicted. He recorded in Psalms 109:22 (NASV), “For I am afflicted and needy, And my heart is wounded within me.” David's son, King Solomon lived with a wounded father and saw the results of his wounds first hand. He wrote in Proverbs 18:14 (KJV), “The spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity; but a wounded spirit who can bear?”
Even the apostle Paul, who many regard as the greatest Christian who ever lived, struggled with self-inflicted wounds. He recorded in Romans 7:18-21 and 24 -25a (NLT) "I know I am rotten through and through so far as my old sinful nature is concerned. No matter which way I turn, I can't make myself do right. I want to, but I can't. When I want to do good, I don't. And when I try not to do wrong, I do it anyway. But if I am doing what I don't want to do, I am not really the one doing it; the sin within me is doing it. It seems to be a fact of life that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord."
Like Paul, I also have self-inflicted wounds. During my college years I began to routinely overeat. I simply fell in love with food. Unfortunately it didn't and doesn’t love me back. Our cafeteria at Hardin-Simmons was an all-you-can-eat one and I certainly got my money's worth. I exercised a lot so it didn't hurt me, but after I married my beloved bride, Chris, after our sophomore year, the pounds started to accumulate. Now, in addition to living with Type 2 diabetes, high cholesterol, and high blood pressure I live with the possibilities of heart disease, stroke, and early death. Although I try not to do wrong (overeat or eat food that is bad for me) I often do it anyway. When I try to do what is good (eat reasonably or eat food that is good for me), I often don't. I often do not treat my body as the temple of the Holy Spirit, which is also a bad witness. I take some comfort in knowing that I’m not the only Christian to struggle with sin but it does little to relieve my guilt whenever I have trouble bending over or step on a scale. It’s hard for me to look at myself in the mirror and not say, “You’re a failure.”
Fortunately we Christians are no longer enslaved to sin. Paul told the Romans in 6:6-7, 11 (NLT), "Our old sinful selves were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose its power in our lives. We are no longer slaves to sin. For when we died with Christ we were set free from the power of sin...So you should consider yourselves dead to sin and able to live for the glory of God through Christ Jesus."
Regardless of how we received our wounds and how deep they are there is a hope – and that hope is Jesus.
Isaiah wrote of the coming savior’s sacrifice in 53:5 (NLT), “But he was wounded and crushed for our sins. He was beaten that we might have peace. He was whipped, and we were healed!” Jesus was wounded for us. He paid the penalty for your sin and mine by dying in our place. He healed us.
Peter said it in a different way in 1 Peter 2:24 (NASV), “and He Himself bore our sins in His body on the cross, so that we might die to sin and live to righteousness; for by His wounds you were healed.”
One of the first verses that I memorized after I became a Christian, and one of my favorites, is 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV), “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” When we receive Christ as our savior and Lord we become a new creature. Our old self that was mired in sin died. We have a new self that has been raised up with Christ. This does not stop us from sinning but now, through the Holy Spirit that lives inside of us, we are no longer slaves to sin and have the power to overcome it.
We can receive healing through confession and prayer. James encouraged us in 5:16 (NASV), “Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.”
Eldredge summarized how to do this in a unique way. He states that we need to acknowledge to God that we are wounded. He’s just as angry and hurt about the wounds that we received as we are. We need to ask him to heal us and to make us new. Eldredge encourages us to grieve over wounds that we received from others and to come to grips with what happened. He stresses that we will never be healed unless we forgive the one who inflicted the wound. When you and I are ready to be healed we must acknowledge that the wound hurt a lot, we didn't deserve what happened, it mattered tremendously, but we release the one who wounded us.
That includes self-inflicted wounds. Often the hardest person to forgive is ourselves.
When we don’t forgive the one who wounded us we think that we're getting back at him or her, but in reality we are destroying ourselves physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Bitterness can make us very sick and even kill us. Emotional consequences include having hatred in our hearts and losing balance. Spiritual consequences include losing our joy and peace and even coming to a point where we are no longer able to grow in Christ or to be used by Him.
We are also commanded to forgive. Jesus said in Matthew 6:14-15 (NIV), “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
When we forgive others we set the captive free and afterwards, to our surprise, we learn that the captive was us.